Having a Fictional Crush Isn't Pathetic, It's Awesome

I'm not happy in my own little world for nothing.

I've explained previously that I am so invested in fantasy and I'm 110% okay with that. No matter what medium it is, I love to divulge into different dimensions and worlds.

Plays, books, video games, music, films, dreams...

Through these realms, I've met a lot of people along the way. These people taught me more than you could ever know about life and prepared me for very real struggles. They've inspired me to take great leaps and a lot of them are the reason I'm here today, doing what I'm doing.

Yet throughout my childhood, I was often made fun of for my dreamy state of mind. And as I got older, I noticed that remotely caring about a nonexistent world was...well, lame. Until I saw hundreds of thousands of other girls on the internet also really connect to the characters that stole their hearts. So why were we shaming these young girls? Was there an actual valid reason? Of course not.

I want to live in a world where we all can take pride in our fictional crushes, because sometimes, it's better than real life and can help us more than hurt us. Let me tell you why having a fictional crush is actually low-key maybe high-key AWESOME.


1. You get to learn about relationships without actually dealing with relationships.
Thanks to these on-screen couples, from a very young age, you have a general idea of what is expected in a relationship and what you should avoid. People without this education could potentially get themselves involved in harmful, parasitical connections. 

2. You find out what you value.
Is it integrity? Is it intelligence? Is it spirituality? Is it artistry? I don't believe in having a 'type,' but I do believe we value certain traits in a person and you'll notice a theme in your fictional crushes. This will help you in the future if you choose to date someone.

3. You become more understanding.
When you are truly invested in a fictional world, you see all sides of the story. You now understand a bit more why people act the way they do instead of approaching it from a selfish angle. Because, hey, who knows what really happened behind the scenes. Who knows what that person had to go through.

4. It shows you're passionate, and that's pretty badass.
If you show that you care about these characters that are barely real, it shows how enthusastic you get about things, which is something EVERYONE loves to be around. You're more likely to get hired, more likely to work in the field you want, more likely to date someone awesome, more likely to live a happier life. 

5. It shows you like people for the complicated mess they are, instead of objectifying them.
If you have a crush on a character from a series you've really been involved in, that means you know that character really well. You've seen all their flaws, their quirks, and all the messed up shit they've done. Yet you still stand by them. That alone shows you value people for who they truly are instead of what they look like or their image. Kudos to you.

6. It's super cute and says a lot about you.
In a way, I think it shows a little bit of your soul to others. Everyone knows about most of my fictional crushes, one of them being Severus Snape. It's apart of who I am! It's apart of what makes me, me. And I think it says a lot about the kind of person I am, too. 


  1. This. This is wonderfully explained and well written! Sometimes girls are very conscious of what they read and are invested in, but in my opinion it's a wonderful thing to embrace because it shows how creative your mind really is. Not to mention it always brings out the passionate side of you. I personally sound like a college professor whenever I start speaking about the HP series or a character that I have the biggest crush on. The connection between a character and a reader is one to be embraced because all these wonderful authors for us and paint the pictures on the canvas that is our mind, so why shy away from it?

    Thanks for this!

    1. Thank you so much! I'm so glad you get it. It always reminds me of the quote "people are the prettiest when they talk about something they really love with passion in their eyes." So many hide themselves and their passions with a fear of being judged, but it's best to embrace them all, even the little ones, like fictional crushes!

      Thanks for reading.