& i'm callous & i'm cruel to everyone but you;

it has always been this way.

iced green tea with hints of mint and lemongrass
remind me of you.
and it reminds me of the girl i used to be.

every orchestra and choir full of sopranos and tenors
sing the songs we used to sing,

but maybe you're a baritone now
and maybe i've always been an alto.

i still like the words you sing
and how they vibrate through the air
even if you're trying too hard.
{its still cuter than everyone else}

you used to summon the angels with every note
and i used to cry every time you did.

when the curtains would open,
i knew one thing for certain:
my cheeks were blushing more
than each and every rose you would hold that night.

it was probably march or april or may,
but all i remember is my
long chestnut brown hair
with no tangles or tears
touching the wind for you.

i am reminded of you too often
and it feels so wrong
because you are standing right in front of me
laughing like a little kid
dancing for audiences bigger than before
yet i miss the acoustic hymns we used to sing in the small towns we inhabited.

i don't want to write anymore
even if everyone is reading,
unless it's about you.

so i sip on that iced green tea,
trying to take mental notes
of the notes of lemongrass and mint.

i close my eyes and dream of spring.
autumn and winter may make my heart do a temporary dance,
but the spring we bloomed together makes my soul do endless piroquettes.