Home is Where the Heart Is

I love to think about what my future home will look like. I want my house to look like what I look like on the inside; I want my house to be an expression of who I am. Home for me isn't really a place, it's more of a person. I'm happy I can say that because I will be traveling a lot, living in between NYC / Santa Monica / Los Angeles / New Zealand / Paris...many different locations. Soon I'll be moving into a cute little apartment, which will upgrade to hotels, beach houses, and eventually settling down somewhere on a beach. I am really excited to share with you my inspiration boards for my future home! Hopefully one day I can share with you my real home. 

Living Room: 
Mahogany bookcases, the grandfather clock singing at midnight, old fashioned paintings, victorian furniture, a cozy fireplace, warm tea on every single table, the aroma of apple cider and burning oak filling up the room, the room screaming of knowledge, my pet cutely sitting on the cream colored couch, book and journals messily placed all over the room. This is what I envision for my living room. When I read my favorite classic literature, the author uses perfect imagery and this is what pops up in my mind. Having a living room like this will help me feel inspired, pure, and true to myself. Perfect for cold winter nights, perfect for reading, perfect for conversations full of depth. An absolute timeless, beautiful setting.

Living Room #2 / Theatre Room
I have an immense appreciation for film. I spend a lot of my free time watching a good movie, with my love and a delicious snack by my side. I value film and the moments I have while watching it, whether it be at the movie theatre or at my house. It's a time where I can really just relax and enjoy what's in front of me. I've dreamed about having a mini movie theatre in my home since I was little. I think it's a cute addition to a home. I don't want to have a television anywhere else but here, this room is solely just for movie / netflix nights. It's important for me to have a good setting while watching a film and this is perfect!

I imagine myself spending a lot of time in the kitchen. Let's put it simply: I love to cook and I love to eat. For some reason, I've imagined myself having a red kitchen with black highlights and checkered floor tiles. With the perfect coffee machine, white tupperware, a gorgeous chandelier, and matching silverware. I got the inspiration for my kitchen from fifties diners. I know it clashes with the rest of my house, but I'll probably tone it done a bit. I want my kitchen to be like a fifties diner: music playing that makes you wanna dance, bright colors, delicious food, and happiness guaranteed. I'm really excited about tupperware...I always go to Target and pretend like I'm shopping for bowls and plates. Shhhh, don't tell anyone I said that.

Master Bedroom:
There are two things that are really important to me when coming to the master bedroom: white bedding and a huge window. I like the purity, innocence, and relaxation that white bedding gives off. It's simple yet complex. I need a huge window because I want to go to bed every night being able to stare at the moon and the stars; and I want to wake up early every morning to the sun rise. I used to have sleepovers at my grandmothers' old condo and I just remember lying in her bed staring at the moon. It's very crucial that I get to do that. My bedroom is going to be mainly for mornings and nights. The color theme is white, creme, and pastel. I see a walking closet overflowed with clothes and a beautiful bathroom attached. A simple, beautiful room.
The bathroom is going to be a sanctuary for me considering I have to get ready every morning and settle down every night. I love to take baths, so I must have a white bathtub. Candles, bath bombs, some of my favorite books and magazines in a basket next to the tub. A snow white vanity with perfume and lipstick on it. His & her sinks with caramel colored towels on the counter. A small window in the corner, giving off lightness or darkness. The scent of rose water, lavender, and jasmine taking over the room. I feel relaxed just talking about this.

Like I mentioned earlier, I am going to be traveling a lot and living in a lot of different locations so I can't say for sure what my "backyard" will be like. But I need to have some kind of backyard, whether it be a terrace, a porch, or an acre of land, because spending time outdoors keeps us all sane! I will be spending most of my time living in the city. So, a terrace with flowers, fairy lights, and a view of the city sounds perfect to me. My soon-to-be college dorm has a beautiful view of Manhattan  which I am so excited about! Regardless of where I am, I will be with my true home, my true love, and that's what's important. 


When I read the work of people,
I read the work of people.

When I read the work of poets,
I read the work of God.


advancements in science and technology
cyber thoughts, no words said
no eyes met, no hands held
blinded progress & unanswered questions

"it will help us," they said.
"it will make you happy," they said.

the labels and names
proper and precise
the research and knowledge
that can't be real.

unseen things are real

no depth or youth
wasted bodies in an earth-toned room
learning about chemical reactions between
not people.

if you are a proton, i'm an electron,
two atoms in a molecule.
if that's scientifically correct
or politically correct
or morally correct

The Last Sunset

This is the last poem I write
for you.
Your soothing voice
and the way your whole body shakes when you laugh;
it's like your shoulders are screaming for applause,
wanting the whole world to see your approval.
Your deconstructionist attitude
and your shaggy blonde hair
and your annoying John Mellancamp pandora station.

These are things I don't care about ever seeing again -
I'll never listen to your records.
I'll never drive by your house just to see if you're in.
I'll never let my breath get caught in my throat because you turned around to talk to me.
That's not me anymore.

I've always loved your name
and I never held your hand,
but I'm okay with that.

You were so tall, I couldn't reach you,
but you made me feel something real once.
And I thank you for that.

This is the
last sunset
and it sure is mediocre,
I found my real paradise somewhere else.

Ethereal Interviews: SEPTEMBER 2013 x LAUREN FAIRWEATHER

During the Era of Harry Potter, I used to listen to this girl's music daily. Her song Outside World was the most played song on my iPod for years because I listened to it that much. This girl is Lauren Fairweather. She is a musician, a vlogger, a crafter, a blogger, and an overall awesome woman. Her smile radiates joy to the entire world...and a person like that doesn't go unnoticed. For more of Lauren's information, check out her website: www.laurenfairweather.com Enjoy the interview!

Hi Lauren! What have you been up to this summer?
-I just got back from LeakyCon in Portland, which was amazing. And when I got back, I left right away to join my family on vacation. I've been busy so far! 

You seem to have a very deep connection to Snape and Lily from the Harry Potter series, considering you based an entire album off of their relationship. Why do you think you are so connected to them? And why should they have ended up together?
-The first time I read that chapter, it really pulled the whole series together for me. I had no idea how JK Rowling could manage to explain the complexity of Snape's character in one short book, and she managed to do it flawlessly in one chapter! It really broke my heart in the best way possible. At the time especially, I was experiencing one too many unrequited crushes and I think that's why it hit me so hard. I don't think that they should have ended up together necessarily... Snape wasn't exactly raised to be a compassionate human being and he never really understood or supported Lily when she was upset. She deserved someone who was able to listen and Snape just couldn't get past his hatred of James and friends. I feel like his abusive parents set him up to be lonely and miserable. But at the same time, maybe if they had been sorted into the same house, they wouldn't have grown apart so quickly and Snape could have learned to love in a way that doesn't hurt the people close to him. 

A lovely girl meets a lovely guy through a lovely fandom, and they get married! You are very lucky when it comes to love. What is your definition of love, and to you, what is the most important thing in a relationship? 
-For me, love is finding someone who understands you on the deepest level and someone who is willing to support you no matter what. I think the most important thing is communication and honesty. You should be able to trust and talk to this person. 

Name five things the Harry Potter fandom has given you that you are thankful for. 
-Matt, my friends, incredible experiences, self-confidence, and overall happiness. 

I admire how sweet you are, you can truly turn someone's day around with one smile. But there seems to be a lot more beyond that smile. What is something about you most people don't know about? (that you are comfortable sharing, of course)
-I've shared probably too much over the years, so I feel like anyone who pays attention to my youtube videos could know me pretty well. But recently, I started running! I ran my first 5k race while we were in Portland for LeakyCon. I was never very athletic and I especially hated running in gym class, so I was excited to find out that I can actually enjoy it when I'm running on my own terms. 

Music brings so many people together. Music is universal. Everyone loves music. To you, what makes music so powerful?
-It's an incredibly personal creative outlet. Even when I'm writing from a character's perspective, it's one that I chose because of my connection to it. So when people listen to my songs and they connect with them, it shows me that I'm not alone. That's a pretty powerful thing right there. 

Out of every artistic outlet (videos, music, drawing/painting, writing, etc), which one conveys your emotions the best?
-Probably music, but I express myself in a variety of ways depending on how I'm feeling and what I'm in the mood for. I really love crafting, graphic design, journaling, and video blogging in addition to writing and performing music. 

Do you consider yourself a spiritual person? Why/why not?
-I'm not really sure. I believe that there's something to all of this beyond a bunch of cells, but I've never been very religious so it doesn't really take form. One thing I do know is that I try to be as nice as I can to people. You can really affect someone's day just by smiling and being polite, even though you'll never know quite how much. Every person's world is separate and enormous and special, but you never really have the opportunity to experience anything but your own. You can imagine it though, and I imagine that everyone's world would be a lot better if people were just always nice and thoughtful, even to people they've never seen before. 

Lets dig a bit deeper. Every human has a purpose. What do you believe your purpose on this Earth is?
-To figure out who I am and to be that person as best as I can, even if it's a person that not everybody else understands. 

Thank you for taking the time to answer these questions. What is one word of advice you would like to offer readers? 
-Do what you love! People may think you're a little bit weird if what you love is a bit outside of the box, but I'd rather be weird than unhappy. 

dance with me forever;

; the seagulls kiss the sky
the ocean kisses the shore
and the moon kisses the sun
the flowers bloom and they die;
but are reborn every spring.
everlasting spring, plant flowers in my heart;

mahogany bookcases, never-ending flames burning in the fireplace, old paintings hanging from our invisible wall, the morning sun shining from our windowpane; kissing your eyelids so gently
but only I can kiss your soul;

to awaken your senses
and free your mind of all darkness,
this sluggish body does not define you
you are a dictionary with no words
we are a storybook with no end;
I promise thee
the pouring rain kisses your skin roughly but only I can kiss your soul;

the piano whimpers on and on
like teardrops on my face
I feel your heart travel through the stars for me;
my periwinkle dress and pearls speak of those golden smiles we planted on our faces and let grow so gracefully they exploded like a thousand suns;
and the manhattan nights we once had; one and only; forever and always;

if you are the darkness,
I will enlighten you to a bright path
with thousands of green sunflowers
If you are the ocean, I am the shore;
you kiss me, continuously, always coming back
through every tide and every moon;

I'll be seeing you in every dark red curtain in New York;
and I'll be loving you in every Bordeaux cherry ice cream cone;
dancing through each moment - only a heartbeat of eternity;

so dance with me,
dance with me on the clouds,
dance with me in paris,
dance with me on saturn's rings,
dance with me then
dance with me now
and never stop
dance with me forever;

Colors of the Wind

Autumn is here and I could not be more excited about it! Pumpkin spice flavored everything, scarves and boots, new beginnings,  and new experiences. Seasonal changes remind us of this: change is beautiful, life is meant to be celebrated, there are more important things in life than just superficiality, and the circle of life is eternal.

It's amazing how every time one season ends and another begins, we are just as excited as we were last year. We know what to expect yet we still jump for joy every Christmas Eve, every first snowfall, every first swim of summer, every first sight of leaves on the ground, and so on. Sometimes we get caught up in school, our 9 to 5 jobs, and our obligations. So much that we forget that life is meant to be enjoyed. There's more to life than just getting by.

Autumn makes death look beautiful. Winter makes suffering look pure. Spring makes birth look divine. Summer makes life look infinite. We need to compare ourselves to the seasons. Forever going through all the stages of life with complete gratitude and grace. Spend every second the way you would spend eternity because YOU are in eternity now. Space and time don't exist, but you do. Eternity isn't a place or a thing, it's now. That's why you should live in the moment...happily...just how you picture it. Listen to Colors Of The Wind from Pochantas: that's everything I am trying to convey. Enjoy your autumn lovelies, and when it's over, accept it. Then it shall be time to enjoy winter! So be it!

"You think you own whatever land you land on. The Earth is just a dead thing you can claim. But I know every rock and tree and creature has a life, has a spirit, has a name. You think the only people who are people are the people who look and think like you. But if you walk the footsteps of a stranger, you'll learn things you never knew. Come run the hidden pine trails of the forest. Come taste the sunsweet berries of the Earth. Come roll in all the riches all around you and for once, never wonder what they're worth. The rainstorm and the river are my brothers. The heron and the otter are my friends. And we are all connected to each other in a circle, in a hoop that never ends. How high will the sycamore grow? If you cut it down, then you'll never know. And you'll never hear the wolf cry to the blue corn moon, for whether we are white or copper skinned, we need to sing with all the voices of the mountains. We need to paint with all the colors of the wind You can own the Earth and still. all you'll own is Earth until: You can paint with all the colors of the wind."

LUCKY ONES // Summer Love